Waking Up
ALTERD: Yesterday you spoke about self-acceptance and waking up early. How do these two experiences connect for you?
Getting up early, or even just on time, has become a quiet measure of how well I’m accepting my life as it is. The more I recognize my place in the world, the easier it becomes to move through it.
One pattern I’ve learned to recognize in myself is how depression feels like gravity working overtime. On those days, the floor becomes my default destination. The moment I push myself out of bed, I take a few steps and sit right back down on whatever clear patch I can find. It feels like a protective part of me is trying to shield me from the day, convincing me that staying close to the ground is safer. It’s ironic, my version of “grounding” is usually just a way to avoid feeling anything at all.
So when I wake up and my next step feels obvious, when I can stand, move, and simply begin, I take it as a small but meaningful sign: today might actually be a good day.
“It’s ironic, my version of “grounding” is usually just a way to avoid feeling anything at all.”
Wow 💕